Thinking Will Be The Death Of Me.

I hate thinking. I realize it’s a natural attribute given to humans, and we can’t avoid it. But I hate the process, because I start thinking about stuff I shouldn’t, and get really down on myself. Like knowing I have missed major opportunities to change the direction of my life for good. Knowing that I could be doing so much more than I am right now. Also thinking about what could have been if people hadn’t gotten in the way of God’s purpose in my life. I mean I guess, If people could change it, then it wasn’t ultimately God’s purpose. It kills me to think that people who have never met me could hate me so much, or not “hate”; dislike. I hate thinking. I get so caught up in notions of what could have been, and what should have been, but ignore what is happening, and that the ultimate purpose God has for me, is perfect. I hate being alone, and thinking about that all the time. Getting teased and picked on, because I’m getting old, and am still single. I think about it too much. Therefore, once again; I get down on myself for thinking about it. Thinking will be the death of me.

One thought on “Thinking Will Be The Death Of Me.

  1. I’m a natural brooder too. It’s not the thinking. It’s the thinking about the wrong things. One of my recent ones was about hating my flawed tendencies. Nice work on this one.

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